#36 More Practical Numbers of Handicapped Parking Spaces
America is a tremendously wasteful society. We throw away uneaten food, we don’t recycle as often we should, and as recent environment enthusiast Sheryl Crowe pointed out, we use more than one ply of toilet paper when wiping our asses in the bathroom - for shame, America. Although not every example of wastefulness can be easily remedied, I can think of one example, which angers Americans on a daily basis, that can be remedied in a synch: the excess number of handicapped parking spaces in lots across the country.
Although I am certainly sensitive to special requirements of handicapped Americans, it is quite obvious that we have gone overboard in awarding them premier parking lot real estate. America, sooner or later, needs to address our country’s habitual problem of wastefulness, and taking shit away from handicapped Americans seems like a terrific place to start. After all, they already have their own Olympics, and many of them get to sit around in comfortable chairs all day - isn’t it about time we leveled the playing field?
In closing, I would like to point out that I am not, in fact, an asshole. I just play one to get chicks (usually not handicapped ones).
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9 Comments, Comment or Ping
-Zach-
I think that what we should do is create a handicap parking lot about 1/4 mile away. It would be built on a slight hill so that people in wheel chairs could easily coast right down to the store. It would save non-handicap people from walking and the wheelchair users wouldn’t use any energy to get down to the store. It might even be fun!
The problem is…..how to get back to their car. I haven’t quite figured that out yet.
May 15th, 2008
Jon
Dude, that’s easy!
You make a conveyor belt and have them apply their locks as the belt brings them back up to the hill!
May 15th, 2008
DENTIST HAN SOLO
LEAVE MAH CAPPED WOOKIE ALONE!! GREEDO IS ON MAH TAIL LooL361
May 15th, 2008
justaques
I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve seen handicap spots hit 50% or greater utilization in my entire life. More often, it’s about 5-10% utilization. I really don’t care at a mall or some place with thousands of spots - walking isn’t an issue. But it’s so unbelievably obnoxious when a small urban parking area has 10 spots and 4-5 of them are handicapped… or when you go into a full parking garage with 50 open handicapped spots…
May 15th, 2008
Dude
Why do people get so aggro when you take a disabled spot anyway?
If you want to see an otherwise sane person turn into a slobbering irrational arseclown, just mention that you like to park in handicapped parking spaces. It’s only a parking space ffs, but people act as if you’re killing babies. I’m sure disabled people have faced greater challenges than finding out that someone has taken their parking space.
May 15th, 2008
David
The solution is easy! You invent a useless war that generates enough handicapped people to fill the parking spaces!
May 16th, 2008
urmom
When someone beats the living shit out of you and puts you in a wheelchair for being a complete asshole, then maybe you’ll understand.
May 16th, 2008
Jim Strathmeyer
Actually, Zack sort of hits the nail on the head here. The reason why the majority of people have handicap stickers is because they are the closest spots. Move those spots a bit farther away and watch the problem melt away.
May 29th, 2008
an architect
I could not agree more with this blog entry, i design building in LA and we provide a TON of disabled (the P.C. word for the H.C. people) spots. But what we have been learing recently is that over 40% of the people who now use the spaces have almost nothing wrong with them and they just want the parking benefit (this is true in LA maybe other places are different.) I guess have a close friend as a doctor has benefits!
May 31st, 2008
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